First they came for Christmas, and I said nothing

Now that the battle has been fought and lost over Christmas "the Winter Festival", the moral guardians of western culture are taking aim at Halloween:

The two most devastating words any red-blooded American kid is likely to hear are "Fall Festival."

It can mean only one thing: The War on Halloween is once again upon us.

No, the War on Halloween won't induce the same zealous indignation that, say, the War on Christmas can. For me, though, it's far worse.

We're still weeks from this glorious pagan celebration, but you can already hear the sound of the pinheads sucking the fun out of life.

Recently, Halloween celebrations were banned at Kohl Elementary School in Westminster. The story garnered national attention after the principal sent home a newsletter alerting parents that their children's yearly Halloween party would be replaced by a — gulp — fall celebration.

Costumes? Forget it.

My favourite quote from the article is "Well, as one fourth-grade Kohl teacher puts it — and I paraphrase here — if even one child feels left out because of Halloween, we've all failed."